The Nanny Tax Nightmare

"The perils of trying to comply with our Byzantine payroll laws—and how Washington can make the system easier for parents who want to do the right thing."


It's a good thing I haven't been tapped for public office. As I discovered last year, it's frighteningly easy to run afoul of the nanny tax, even when you're trying to follow the rules.

I dedicated dozens of hours to paperwork and even so, missed a payment for my nanny's unemployment insurance taxes. The $250 fine hurt. But the worst came later when my husband and I had to part ways with our nanny, in part because we were spending so much trying to comply with I.R.S. rules that we couldn't give her the raise she wanted. And so, on behalf of the hundreds of thousands of families like us, I'm hereby asking Washington to make it a little easier for us to do the right thing.

My husband and I had avoided the nanny-tax hassle for years, relying on grandma, flexible job schedules, an au pair who was exempt, and a parade of high-school and college babysitters who we didn't pay enough to hit the tax threshold. Last year we hired a young woman to watch our three children 20 hours a week, and we suddenly found ourselves owing payroll taxes. It was as if we'd morphed into a corporation. We weren't prepared for how expensive it would be, nor for the hair-pulling, late-night sessions in front of an Excel spreadsheet. As a friend said, "I have to do as much work to pay my nanny as 3M does to pay its employees."

I started polling friends about nanny taxes this week after President Obama's pick for chief performance officer, Nancy Killefer became yet another casualty of a nanny tax scandal. If you want to separate your real friends from your Facebook "friends," by the way, ask whether they pay the nanny tax. If they don't trust you, it's an awkward conversation. About half my friends with nannies pay the taxes, including one lawyer dad who said he wouldn't be able to sleep at night if he didn't. "If I'm not paying this, then the woman who takes care of my children is not going to get the Social Security she deserves," he said. "For a lot of nannies, it's not like down the road they're going to be making so much money that it will replace these low earning years."

Then there was my friend who pays a babysitter to watch her child while she attends school. When I told her late one night that she owed the nanny tax, she paused, and then said with utter fatigue, "I'm just going to forget we had this conversation." I happen to know she would have been forced to cut into her grocery budget to pay even a couple more dollars an hour. And those few bucks can add a surprisingly amount to the cost of childcare.

For us, paying the tax meant an extra $200 a month. For some families, the extra hit can be the difference between making money by going to work, or barely breaking even. Call me naive. We hadn't factored in taxes when we agreed with our nanny on an hourly rate. Suddenly her $14 per hour wage turned into a $16.50 per hour expense after we added federal and state unemployment insurance tax and 15 percent in FICA taxes (6.2 percent for the employee portion of Social Security, another 6.2 percent for the employer portion; 1.45 percent for the employer portion of Medicare and another 1.45 percent for the employee portion). We could have taken the employee portion out of her wage, but we knew she would have seen it as a pay cut.

As it turned out, we ended up mutually parting ways before she'd been with us a year. She wanted a raise. And after paying FICA, we simply couldn't pay her more. Meanwhile, we were competing against families who can pay more because they pay in cash. Even if you can afford to match the competition and still pay the nanny tax, the paperwork alone might be enough to send you over the brink. One friend tried to calculate her nanny taxes herself. She got it wrong and was fined. And she is doctor who understands statistics. "Trying to pay this on our own created so much stress," she said. "It seemed ridiculous that it should be that difficult." She ended up forking over $500 a year to have a payroll company handle it.

You can't even trust your accountant to get it right. After we got inaccurate advice from our tax-prep firm we too tackled the tax ourselves. I applied for a federal and a Minnesota tax ID number, printed out weekly payroll receipts and calculated the Social Security and Medicare taxes to withhold. I stayed up past midnight trying to fill out a quarterly wage detail on the Minnesota State Unemployment Web site before the deadline passed and we were fined … again.

I'm not suggesting that we eliminate this requirement, but we should not have a system where anyone who's ever hired a summer babysitter and not paid the tax is made unfit for public office. Parents owe payroll taxes if they paid a nanny more than $1,600 in 2008. Let's raise that threshold. And simplify the paperwork. In the meantime, here's my advice: If you aspire to public office, hire a company to handle your nanny tax. Or, enroll your child in the nearest child-care center. It's cheaper, you won't have to bother about taxes. And, you'll meet more of your constituency.

Maja Beckstrom Lives In St. Paul, Minn., Where She Writes About Family And Parenting For The St. Paul Pioneer Press. She Originally Blogged About The Nanny Tax For The Newspaper's Parenting Web Site, Minnmoms.Com. She Plans To Devote This Weekend To Figuring Out Her Former Nanny's W-2 Form.
URL: http://www.newsweek.com/id/183487

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Self Defense For Women

Self Defense: A Necessity for Women

Whoever thought that the world would become a better place in due time and with technological advancements and modernization was wrong. The world is still as hostile a place, and the only thing that has changed is the weapons. Crime has become more sophisticated in nature but the sad part is that women are still considered as soft targets.

Crime on women has in fact, increased over the years in developed countries like the US and UK and across the world. Let us first take a look at the worldwide statistics for crime on women:

• 1 in every 3 women across the world has been subjugated to rape or sexual assault. (Data: 2001)
• In some developing countries, at least one-third of the adolescent girls have been forced into sexual initiation (Data: 2002)
• Sex crimes in South Africa take place every twenty seconds. (Data: 2000)
• Major incidents of rapes have been reported in 12 African provinces. The rate has increased considerably from 182 in 2001 to 270 in 2002.
• 14,000 of the 331,815 reported crimes committed against women in the Russian Federation were rapes.
• According to a survey in the United Kingdom it was found that 19.4 % of the women there have been victims of some kind of sexual violence. (Data: 2001)
• 40% of girls in South East Asia are being forced into prostitution as a means to feed their families.

Now let’s take a look at the US

• One of the startling facts is that 1 in 3 American women are sexually assaulted in their lifetime.
• 89% of sexual crimes have been committed by someone known to the victim.
• In 2002, there were 247,730 victims of rape, attempted rape, or sexual assault.
• In 2005-2006, there were 232,010 victims of rape, attempted rape, or sexual assault.
• Around 44% of rape victims are under age 18, while 80% are under age 30.


Sources (2005)

1. The World Bank. http://www.worldbank.org
2. “International Statistics.” http://www.sexualassault.virginia.edu/statistics_international.htm
3. United Nations Development Fund for Women. “Facts and Figures: Sexual Violence in Non-Conflict Situations.” http://www.unifem.org/campaigns/november25/facts_figures_3.php
4. The World Health Organization. “Sexual Violence Facts.” http://www.who.int/violence_injury_prevention
5. United Nations Development Fund for Women. “Stop Violence against Women: Prevalence of Sexual Assault.” http://www.stopvaw.org/PrevalenceofSexualAssault.html or http://www.unifem.org
6. National Center for Victims of Crime (2004)
7. NSVRC. “Global perspectives on Sexual

In such an insecure world, it is far more difficult for a woman to survive as compared to their male counterpart. But all is not lost because there are several methods or weapons that a woman can use to thwart an assaulter. One of the most powerful and popular weapons is the pepper spray, which has a far-reaching effect. The motive behind using pepper sprays as opposed to lethal weapons like Guns is that pepper sprays or Tasers will not kill the assaulter or anyone trying to commit crime on a woman but at the same time, these weapons are extremely effective and can save a woman’s life and dignity.

The different types of crimes on women include:

• Carjacking
• Rape
• Murder & Theft
• Theft
• Sexual abuse
• Domestic violence
• Purse snatching
• Stalking
• Threats
• Property crimes
• Sexual harassment in the office

Of all these crimes, rape, sexual abuse, sexual harassment in office premises and stalking has a higher rate than other crimes. In such a crime, a woman can use a pepper spray, Taser or martial art techniques for self defense.

The Pepper Spray

The Pepper spray is also called an OC spray, where OC stands for Oleoresin Capsicum. It is basically a powerful lachrymatory agent, a chemical compound that can cause severe irritation in the eyes and ears and even lead to temporary blindness and severe pain. The pepper spray is used the world over by women to protect them against any anti-social element and have considerably brought down the number of sexual molestation and rape in many countries.

The Pepper spray can be used for various purposes like controlling a mob, controlling riot and even as a weapon of self-defense against animals like bears, wolves, and dogs. It is completely non-lethal although it can be deadly if not used in small quantities. In 1995, the American Civil Liberties Union had documented 14 cases of pepper spray use that turned fatal. If you spray an entire can of Pepper Spray into someone’s eyes then in all probability the subject will go permanently blind.

The primary ingredient in Pepper spray is called capsaicin. Capsaicin is a chemical compound that can be derived from the fruits of a special plant belonging to the Capsicum genus and chillies. There are several different types of Pepper spray in use like Mace Pepper Sprays, Wildfire Pepper Spray, Lipstick Pepper Spray, and a specific version called the PAVA Pepper Spray. The PAVA Pepper Spray has capsaicin, pelargonic acid vanillylamide or desmethyldihydrocapsaicin and it is extensively used in England. A synthetic counterpart of the pepper spray is called the pelargonic acid morpholide. This was developed in Russia and is widely used there.

Pepper sprays are available in canisters and are considered to be an inflammatory. The moment you use pepper spray on a subject, it will cause severe irritation in the eyes and closing of the eye. Some of the other symptoms include a running nose, difficulty in breathing, and coughing apart from the tears. The duration of a Pepper spray effect actually depends on the amount of spray you have used but on an average it can last from anywhere between thirty minutes to an hour.

Here are some important tips:

1. When you are carrying a can of pepper spray in your hand, your thumb should be on the top of your trigger.
2. If your attacker comes too close too you then back up a little so that you are in a better position to use the spray.
3. Use a good amount of spray so that the chilli pepper can do its job as quickly as possible.
4. While the attacker is in pain and temporarily blind, you should try to get out of there as fast as you can.

TASER C2

One of the best self-defense weapons is a stun gun like the Taser C2. There are several benefits of owning or using a Taser C2 stun gun. It is handy and can be carried just about anywhere. It can be hid in the purse as it is of the size of a TV remote and can be used anywhere, anytime. It can be easily found over the internet and costs around $300.

The Taser C2 delivers a charge or electric current the moment it comes into direct contact with the attacker or the subject in question. The Taser C2 has a range of 15 feet and it can pierce through 2 inches of clothing. The range will help any woman to prepare and defend herself well in advance.

The Taser C2 is an electronically controlled device or ECD. The cartridge consists of two electrodes, which are propelled through the air with the help of two wires and compressed nitrogen. The electrodes pierce through the clothing and stick to the skin. Electrical pulses are transmitted through the wires to the electrodes and into the body of the attacker. The effect is stunning and the attacker will go into a shock. The effect will last long enough for you to flee from there or call for law enforcement agents. The Taser C2 can be fired to anywhere on the body and is non-lethal hence can be used extensively by women to thwart any attack.

Martial Arts

The last line of defense is Martial Arts, which combined with any of the above can prove to be a lethal combination. Martial Arts are not for everyone not because the training is difficult but because it is time consuming too. Martial art is considered to be a lethal force and you might end up killing your attacker. There are different types of martial art forms that can be learnt quickly like Judo, Karate, Taekwondo, and Tai Chi. Karate and Taekwondo are by far the most popular forms and can also cause severe injury to the attacker.

There are certain parts of the human body, which are prone to severe injuries like the face, forehead, neck, abdomen, and groin. You can hit a man or your attacker in the groin and the nose for maximum impact. The strongest weapons of a woman’s body include the head, elbow, and knees. Martial art will teach you to use these body parts effectively to disable or wound your opponent temporarily. A hit with the elbow to the nose will not only stun them but also give you enough time to get away.

The only drawback of Martial arts is that it is effective only in close combat situations but if your subject is fleeing away or is at a distance then the Taser and the Pepper Spray can prove to be highly effective.

Additional information regarding Pepper Sprays and the Taser C2 can be found at http://www.stungunsupply.com

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Discipline - Be Clear, Be Firm, Be Consistent

Children learn best by being given clear, firm and consistent direction from parents who are clear, firm and consistent in their approach.

How to Discipline Children by Being Clear:

Firstly find and maintain clarity within yourself and then follow through on simple, clear instructions. Clarify for your self what being clear means.

It is about being plain, obvious, and understandable in a clear, short sentence that explains exactly what you mean.

It isn't about maybe this or maybe that.

Often parents have no idea that they chop and change their minds within minutes. To become clear about your own patterns of behavior, observe yourself and ask for your partner's help in this.

"We are going to tidy up your toys in five minutes", is clear and direct. Follow this with,

"Please help me tidy up your toys now" and it means just that.

Be firm with yourself about this. It doesn't mean soon, or later, but now.

I have seen parents give out this simple instruction, then become distracted themselves by a television program, conversation or magazine. What their children observe is parents saying one thing and doing another and this gives a much distorted message. Multiplied over many times each day, is it any wonder that children cease to follow simple instructions?

How to Discipline Children by Being Firm:

Firstly find and maintain firmness for yourself and then follow through with firm clear directions in a firm, clear tone.

Clarify for your self what being firm means.

To be firm is to be certain, definite, and determined. It is also being loving, kind and calm.

It means saying no and meaning no, or saying yes and meaning yes and sticking to it. It's about now being now. How often does your no become perhaps, later, maybe giving in, next time, soon, or alright then? This is a very common fault in how to discipline children and again it leads to numerous mixed messages for children.

Resolve within yourself and with your partner's help to ascertain how often you are both easily swayed into changing your decisions. Are you allowing your children to manipulate you? Imagine how simple your life will become when you are clear and firm within yourself.

It is every child's right to KNOW they can trust their parent's boundaries. So firstly, become firm with your own boundaries and then apply this to your parenting discipline.

"It is bedtime, (bath time, meal time) in five minutes" is a clear direction. Now follow through on this.

Giving the direction in a calm, clear, firm tone of voice helps your children to understand that you mean what you say. Being firm is about being in control of both yourself and the situation.

How to Discipline Children by Being Consistent:

Firstly find and maintain consistency for yourself and then follow through with a firm, clear, consistent approach.

Clarify for yourself what being consistent means.

To be consistent is to be reliable, dependable and constant.

These words immediately convey comfort don't they?

Let's look at the opposite of being consistent. Contradictory, unpredictable, changeable. That's definitely lacking in comfort and safety.

So how do you want to be seen by your children?

To begin with it can seem quite time consuming to concentrate on clear, firm, consistent guidelines. Be aware that this is very true. It takes concentrated effort and time to change old habits to new ones, but if you maintain consistency, you will be very surprised how quickly new patterns of behavior are formed.

Parenting Discipline In Summary: With parenting discipline we are teaching our children how to have self control, self discipline and to become self reliant, so they are able to make good choices for themselves.

The only way children can learn to do this is by being given the opportunities for this learning.

This means not over protecting them, or doing everything for them, but maximizing their opportunities to learn through personal experience and observation, even when this means making mistakes.

Can you see the opportunities here to change some of your own patterns of behavior into superior ones?

Clear, firm, consistent parenting is quality parenting. You learn to trust your own responses and your children are surrounded by your loving constancy.

This is the recipe for creating a happy, well adjusted family.

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